“Do You Feel Like A Fraud?”
The word Imposter Syndrome has been a pretty staple descriptor for some time now. And I personally love when there’s a movement that allows people the language to describe their experiences.
People have been able to verbalize how they literally felt like an imposter in the experiences they created. After hard work, determination, and achieving major milestones, they felt like literal imposters in their own lives. Self doubt comes rushing in. And somehow it feels impossible to see the connection between their hard work. Yet so easy to find “proof” that they’re a fraud.
Sound familiar?
It’s such a common phenomenon.
80% of men experience Imposter Syndrome, while a bigger 90% of women suffer from this.
And it goes beyond just work.
“Imposter syndrome can be a crippling entity which impacts so many areas of everyday life…It can consume you whilst on social media;…it can also have an impact on forging friendships.”
And while I love that there is this term, I think the commonality of its usage is allowing us all to overlook a pretty core facet of imposter syndrome.
Lack of confidence.
Lack of confidence and imposter syndrome sound so different.
I personally worry that the term ‘imposter syndrome’ makes it seem like something beyond us, an almost prescribed syndrome.
So when we think about feeling like an imposter in our own lives and the self doubt, and then label it with imposter syndrome, it seems like it’s beyond our own control and harder to shift.
On the other hand, the word confidence evokes a feeling of inner work and dialogue, though. And it is my opinion that lack of confidence is intrinsically tied to self trust, which is even more internal then the word confidence.
Confidence or self trust feels entirely in our own control, where imposter syndrome might not.
The areas of life this phenomenon effects – work, relationships, creating new friendships, our own self talk – are all encompassing. Which makes it that much more of a priority.
But where do you begin?
There are two layers to this.
1. Where did the imposter syndrome, or lack of confidence, come from? What are the roots? In what ways has this idea perhaps become a part of your comfort zone?
2. How does imposter syndrome keep you safe? You may be reading this and think this is absolutely ridiculous that a lack of confidence, or imposter syndrome, is keeping you safe! It may be on an unconscious level. And if it’s giving you even perceived safety, that’s a great benefit.
In coaching, I have supported several clients in feeling more confident, and being able to navigate their lives with more ease. We’ve explored the roots of the lack of confidence, and I promise you, once we’ve identified that, the pattern of lack of confidence (or imposter syndrome) makes complete sense.
Then we are able to see what safety is gained from imposter syndrome – and find new ways to get that safety.
The work is a process, but the beautiful thing about working through imposter syndrome in coaching is it’s completely at your pace, and it’s customized. There isn’t a one size fits all approach for imposter syndrome, and each person’s story is different. I meet my clients where they’re at, so that the progress they make sticks.
If any of this resonates with you, set up an exploratory call with me
With joy,